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The MangyDog Archives!

Here, you'll find links to fantastic past columns from our MangyDog writing staff.  Enjoy, and if you would like to write a guest column or curse us out for being jackasses, feel free to contact us! Thanks, and have a Mangy day!

By the MangyDog staff & friends

Compiled and Answered by Mangy Dog

01/24/03 - Our new weekly feature debuts.
01/29/03 - A tragic tale of matrimony gone wrong.
02/12/03 - Most depressing . . . letter . . . ever.
02/19/03 - Greetings from Amish country!
03/06/03 - Two crazy illiterates, one crazy, illiterate column.
03/16/03 - There's dumb . . . and then there's Tammy.
03/25/03 - A shocking confession . . . to the wrong guy.
04/03/03 - A depressing letter leads to the tragic tale of Zima Boy.
04/07/03 - A quick one.
05/05/03 - The very last Letter Meant For Dr. Phil.
06/19/03 - . . . until this one.
07/18/03 - Hello from Sweden!
09/15/03 - Reading, Schmeading
10/24/03 - A Two-fer!
12/07/03 - Not Dr. Phil's Guide to Sobriety
01/21/04 - Disturbing.
02/27/04 - Featuring a Very Special Guest!
06/08/04 - 79-year old sex addicts? Yeah, we got that.
10/02/04 - It never ends . . .
12/16/04 - FIVE more letters. Jeez.
04/14/05 - EIGHT NEW LETTERS!

OUR FINE COLUMNISTS

Jesse Perry: Random Droppings from the MangyDog

08/26/99 - The first Random Droppings, taking a leak on Limp Bizkit and Kentucky vampires.
10/20/99 - A touching story from my youth, and a tribute to high school angst.
02/21/00 - The first column after our first server exploded.
09/14/00 - So long, Bobby Knight, and the eternal question of Dimwits vs. Cyborgs.
10/06/00 - "A nation of pussies."
10/12/00 - A look at Radiohead's "Kid A".
11/22/00 - The evil of recount jokes.
12/06/00 - The best music of 2000!
12/13/00 - The election post-mortem.
01/15/01 - beggin' and shillin'.
02/07/01 - America the Pre-Pubescent.
02/15/01 - A childhood memory, and the problem with raccoons.
02/26/01 - Earnhardt, Eminem, and Elton.
03/07/01 - Ah . . . spring.
03/12/01 - A Confession. (part 1)
03/25/01 - 5 Steps To Saving Music (BONUS-Home Roadie Song)
04/15/01 - Why Russell Crowe Is A Dipshit.
05/02/01 - Why Russell Crowe Fans Are Dipshits.
05/10/01 - A review of "Gladiator."
06/21/01 - More Exploding Servers.
06/27/01 - Free Nashville Now!
08/07/01 - Living with Chad . . . Dammit.
08/31/01 - Carla, Football, and Three Sick Jokes.
09/12/01 - Reflections on 9/11/01.
09/25/01 - BEAT IT . . . PLEASE.
10/13/01 - Fun With Mister Mean!
10/16/01 - Apologies, Accusations, and Anthrax.
11/10/01 - Smells Like Teen Bullshit.
11/20/01 - IT'S THANKSGIVING, NOW SHUT UP.
11/29/01 - Bitter White Guy Column #30.
12/05/01 - Shameless Plugs Can Be Your Friend!
12/14/01 - Perry/Brockovich
01/03/02 - New Year's Resolutions.
01/10/02 - Bring Me the Head of Geraldo Rivera.
01/18/02 - More Random Droppings.
02/11/02 - Five Rings of Apathy.
02/18/02 - Gimme Some Truth^TM.
02/23/02 - Chuck Jones: 1912-2002
02/28/02 - Pardon My Phlegm.
03/03/02 - Over the Hill and Far Away.
03/12/02 - My Hometown.
03/20/02 - How to Get an Oscar.
03/28/02 - A Stroll Through the Town.
04/03/02 - MY God can Kick YOUR God's Ass!
04/12/02 - The Worst Town in America.
04/18/02 - Kiddie Porn, Dokken, and Central Wisconsin Baseball History.
04/24/02 - John Travolta is Strange.
05/02/02 - So Long, Fucko, Part 1.
05/12/02 - The Strangest Things I've Ever Seen.
05/19/02 - Flipping around the Tube.
05/24/02 - Why I Do Comedy.
05/31/02 - Happy Birthday . . . Whooptee-Doo.
06/05/02 - Clarksville, Chris Rock, and Conflagration.
06/14/02 - Home Alone, Like That Kid.
06/21/02 - I Suck.
06/29/02 - A Meditation on the President's Butt.
07/02/02 - If You Steal Jeff Foxworthy's Lame Ideas, You Might be a Comedian
07/03/02 - Hope I Die Before I Get Like The Who.
07/07/02 - Everybody Must Get Gored.
07/12/02 - Lord of the Jesses.
07/19/02 - A World O' Shit.
07/25/02 - Zacarias Moussaoui, Will You Ever Learn?
08/03/02 - Toby Keith is a Wuss.
08/08/02 - The Bird is the Word.
08/16/02 - Random? I Hardly Even Know 'em!
09/02/02 - Morning DJs Must Die.
09/13/02 - Thanks, Warren.
09/15/02 - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, and Nick Nolte.
09/23/02 - My Number One Fans.
09/26/02 - Random Whimsicalities.
10/02/02 - Reflections with Judge Larry Joe.
10/07/02 - Jesse Perry's Guide to the Movies.
10/10/02 - Headline News, Now With Flava!
10/16/02 - Ryan Adams is a Twit.
10/25/02 - Don't Leave Me, Nashville Digest.
10/30/02 - What Price, Internet Glory?
11/10/02 - A Peek at the Mangy Mailbag.
11/15/02 - Random Randomings.
11/18/02 - Ew's and Ahh's.
11/21/02 - My First Column.
12/05/02 - Loony Larry, and a Dose of Cabin Fever.
12/14/02 - Merry Christmas, Kinda!
12/18/02 - The 2002 Jive Turkey Awards.
12/20/02 - The Year-End Super Happy Terrific Mega-Column!
01/13/03 - Just Like Starting Over.
01/18/03 - It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I'm Flat Broke).
01/21/03 - Help Yourself to Some Self-Help!
01/27/03 - WWYSD?
02/03/03 - Let's Get Apocalyptic!
02/10/03 - Good Ol' Porn
02/19/03 - Hail to the Chumps
03/05/03 - Your God Returns
03/12/03 - Below the Belt
03/18/03 - Happy War Day!
03/27/03 - A Little Bit o' Warrin', A Little Bit o' Whorin'
03/31/03 - War Journal #1
04/10/03 - War Journal #2
04/14/03 - Randomrama!
04/17/03 - Nuke Laloosh is a Liberal Spy
04/27/03 - This Column's Cool as Hell
05/05/03 - TAKE ME!  I'M OLD!
05/09/03 - Madonna is a Talentless Bonehead, and Other Fun Facts
05/15/03 - In a Perfect World . . .
05/21/03 - No Annika?  Moron-ica!
06/02/03 - Happy Birthday, Dr. Sexy!
06/16/03 - 2,000 Words Under the Sea
07/01/03 - Gone Drunclin'
07/15/03 - That's Miss Smith . . . If You're NASTY!
07/21/03 - A Man-Beast in Sheep's Clothing
07/28/03 - I Love Celebrities!
07/30/03 - A Brief History of Jesse Perry
07/31/03 - Comedy Death:  A Photo Scrapbook
08/04/03 - The Magic of Gigli.
08/19/03 - Blowing Rocks and Breathalyzers.
08/27/03 - Fun N' Games with The Great White Stanhope.
09/11/03 - Captain Joke-A-Bunch Pops His Cherry
10/03/03 - Where the Hell Have I Been?
10/14/03 - Jesus, Julia!
10/30/03 - Let's Have Fun at the World's Expense!
11/10/03 - Action Jackson
12/14/03 - HoHoHo, Hacks n' Hippies!
01/06/04 - Thickburgers, Jihad, and Pete Rose.
01/26/04 - Perry's Pope Prefers Printable Propaganda
02/05/04 - Pissing Blood . . . Hilariously!
03/04/04 - Hitting the Nail on the Hand
03/23/04 - Waiter, There's Crack in my Bedpan
04/15/04 - Re: My Sex Scandal
04/29/04 - My New Movie
07/13/04 - Live From the Grassy Knoll
11/27/04 - The State O' The J
02/21/05 - No Effinghammin' Way
08/03/05 - Bask in My Jessence
01/06/06 - My Annual Column
04/09/06 - Ahh, The Biz, Part 1
07/17/06 - Ahh, The Biz, Part 2
06/08/07 - Bennie and the Jess

The Heinous Bastard: Sports News & Views Plus The Hot Chick of the Week

06/27/99 - Bob Costas, The Dallas Stars, women's soccer, sad jockeys, oh my!
07/06/99 - Reader mail, and why the Lakers weren't going to win the NBA title (DOH!)
07/20/99 - Striking umps, and the first part of the 1999 college football preview.
08/03/99 - More on those damn umps, and College Football Preview, part Deux.
08/24/99 - Reader mail, Great baseball, and the triumph of Lance Armstrong.
09/10/99 - The Last American Cowboys.
09/24/99 - Why Florida fans suck.
12/26/99 - Bad jokes and gun control.
02/21/00 - A look at the world of sports during our server crisis.
03/05/00 - A journey to Mecca.
03/22/00 - John Rocker and the evils of ESPN.com.
05/20/00 - Crappy basketball, crappy hockey, and the crappy NCAA.
06/26/00 - The Vols ESPN.com doesn't talk about.
08/??/00 - THB'S 2000 COLLEGE FOOTBALL PREVIEW
10/30/00 - Why Meredith Viera is a sexist pig.
01/05/01 - THB returns, with a rundown on the weird and wonderful in the sports world.
01/10/01 - SEC, BCS, and THB.
01/17/01 - The world of UT athletics.
01/24/01 - The NCAA death penalty.
02/05/01 - The XFL, and a Mangy sports exclusive.
02/07/01 - the myth of National Signing Day.
02/14/01 - College basketball, and those damned ESPYs.
02/28/01 - Frank Thomas, Vol Basketball
03/24/01 - Jerry Green gets canned
08/25/01 - THB'S 2001 COLLEGE FOOTBALL PREVIEW!
11/26/01 - A couple of observations and the Hot Chick Of The Week
12/06/01 - Vols Yea, Gators Nay.
01/14/02 - So long, Spermier!
03/11/02 - March Madness!
03/30/02 - A Brief Snippit
06/12/02 - Darva Conger and Steroids
08/07/02 - THB'S 2002 COLLEGE FOOTBALL PREVIEW!
11/04/02 - GO VOLS . . . Um . . . Yeah.
11/14/02 - Why Women Should Stay in Their Place.
11/20/02 - Why We DON'T Need a College Football Playoff.
08/12/03 - THB'S 2003 COLLEGE FOOTBALL PREVIEW!
08/12/03 - THB'S 6TH ANNUAL COLLEGE FOOTBALL PRESEASON FOOTBALL BONANZA SPECTACULAR!!!
07/31/05 - THB'S 7th Annual College Football Preview

DVD Reviews by Oscar Zacatecas

08/29/00 - "Erin Brockovich," "The 13th Warrior," and much more!
09/22/00 - "28 Days," and crappy Olympic coverage
11/15/00 - "Mission: Impossible 2"
11/28/00 - "X-Men"
12/20/00 - "The Virgin Suicides," "Fantasia 2000," and the "Toy Story" boxed set
01/15/01 - "Hollow Man," "Nutty Professor II: The Klumps"
01/30/01 - "Dinosaur" and "Manhunter"
02/20/01 - "Gone in 60 Seconds" and "Woman on Top" (!)
02/27/01 - "Scary Movie" and "Shriek If You Know What you Did last Friday the 13th"
03/13/01 - "Almost Famous" and "The Contender"
03/24/01 - "Inspector Gadget," "The Tao of Steve" and "Remember the Titans"
04/10/01 - "Legend of Bagger Vance" And Oscar Retrospective...
08/07/01 - "The Mexican" and "3000 Miles to Graceland"
09/17/01 - Oscar Speaks Out.
10/03/01 - "Spiders"
12/19/01 - "Moulin Rouge"
01/10/02 - "The Fast and The Furious", "The Godfather," and AN EXCITING GIVEAWAY.
03/07/02 - Oscar's 2001 Oscar Picks.
06/16/02 - Oscar's Big-Ass Return!
03/17/03 - A New Communique from Oscar Zacatecas
07/27/03 - A peek at "Daredevil."

Guest Columns

12/15/01 - "Here a Flag, There a Flag, Everywhere a Flag Flag," by Rebecca Krefting.
01/05/02 - "I've Got a Gun, and I Know how to Use It," by Rebecca Krefting.
03/23/02 - "Why No One in Their Right Mind Ought to Got to Pittsburgh," by Robin Thornett.
05/28/02 - "Why I Watch Comedy," by an Anonymous Comedy Fan.
06/30/02 - "Dating Should be Against the Law," by Karolyn Ellsworth Lewis.
07/31/02 - "The SEC Needs to Take out the Trash" by Scott Keesee.
08/06/02 - "The Thing About Girls and Underwear" by Robin Thornett.
08/14/02 - "The wrath of ex-girlfriends" by Laura Underhill.
08/22/02 - "Society is Screwed, and I Have Proof" by Kiley Elliston.
08/23/02 - "Summer Movie Review: Signs" by Keith Alberstadt and Vic T. Lussock.
09/08/02 - "Football: A Storytorial" by Karen E. Larson and Kevin Eldridge.
10/07/02 - "Talking about Doin' It" with Pennie Tration.
10/14/02 - "The None of the Above Party Platform" by Earnest Honestly.
11/02/02 - "My $36,000 Education" by Nikki.
11/04/02 - "Equality Rocks" by Katelyn E. Lawless.
11/15/02 - "Who Wants Some Worthless Beads?" by Keith Alberstadt.
11/22/02 - "O Canada, Get the Fuck Away From Me" by Nikki.
12/12/02 - "Wishing You Crazy Holidays" by Ms. Kris Elf.
01/19/03 - "Let's Go Down to the Swimming Hole" by Nikki.
02/04/03 - "Every Fat Person is a Suspect" by Nikki.
04/10/03 - "aint a goddam one of you sumbitches better than me" by Ray.
04/14/03 - "Life was Nerfy" by Keith Alberstadt.
04/18/03 - "More Butter For Her Butt" by Scot Nery.
08/11/03 - The Mangy Dog Roast of "Comedy Central's Roast of Denis Leary" by Jesse Perry and Chad Riden
08/23/03 - "Haunted Comedy" by Keith Alberstadt
09/21/03 - "The Cruel Truth" by Bullshirt
10/13/03 - "Cat Scratch Fever" by Nikki
11/04/03 - "Baseball, Beantown, and Jumping Monkeys (in bed)" by Keith Alberstadt
11/10/03 - "Barry Martin," by Danny Limor.
11/25/03 - "Health Food for Goths" by Scot Nery.
01/05/04 - "The Resolutionary War" by Keith Alberstadt
01/12/04 - "More Cruel Truth" by Bullshirt
01/13/04 - "Europe on Five Fingers a Day" by Mike Roscoe
02/03/04 - "Exposing More in 2004" by Michael Fenn
02/09/04 - "Ten Feet in Ten Minutes" by Michael Fenn
03/01/04 - "Secret Agent Jackass" by Keith Alberstadt
03/16/04 - "The National Pastime's Pastime" by B.W. Davis
03/30/04 - "Muslim Fundamentalist Adolescent Pranks" by Heath Bar
03/30/04 - "Sex With A Very Large Woman" by Robert Levin.
04/20/04 - "Postcards From the Road (The Sequel)" by Keith Alberstadt
05/10/04 - "Subpoena: Funny Word for Unfunny Times" by Kimber Erin Liberalnot
05/27/04 - "Recurring Nightmare" by Keith Alberstadt
06/02/04 - "The Summer Loves" by Anthony Sprott
06/27/04 - "Question This" by Keith Alberstadt
07/09/04 - "What Have You Protested For Me Lately?" by Katie Elizabeth Landers
08/30/04 - "Thai'd in Knots" by Ryan Williams
10/29/04 - "Final Political Reality Check" by Keith Alberstadt
11/17/04 - "Plans For The Future" by B.W. Davis
11/30/04 - "Abb-erations" by Ryan Williams
12/01/04 - "The Wanna-Be" by Brian L.
12/31/04 - "Empty Promises" by Keith Alberstadt
01/13/05 - "Too Lazy to Think of an Interesting Title" by Joel Stice
01/14/05 - "My Life as a Fast-Food Junkie" by Mark Anundson
01/14/05 - "18-25 Year Olds, Wake the Fuck Up" by Rob Haynes
02/07/05 - "Old School and Damn Proud of It " by Keith Alberstadt
02/11/05 - "Thin Line Between Love and Midgets" by Corey Reppond
02/15/05 - "A few open letters" by Ryan Williams
03/29/05 - "Mike Siscoe - Bahamian Legend" by Keith Alberstadt
05/16/05 - "Passing of the Four-Cylinder Torch" by Keith Alberstadt
05/20/05 - "Not all Asians are good at Math" by Mark Anundson
05/23/05 - Kickin' it with "The Fellas" by De'Mun
07/21/05 - "It's Not A Nightclub" by Brian L
09/02/05 - "Katrina Thoughts" by Keith Alberstadt
11/23/05 - "Open Letters to people who desperately need them- Part 2: Eclectic Bugaboo" by Ryan Williams
11/23/05 - "Back from Iraq" by Keith Alberstadt
12/28/05 - "It's Gonna Be a Busy Year" by Keith Alberstadt
01/16/05 - "Friday the 13th In Sports" by Stan Silliman
02/02/06 - "The Alberstadt Heritage Tour" by Keith Alberstadt
02/02/06 - "Why We Do What We Do" by Mary Mack
05/03/06 - "The Big Apple Move" by Keith Alberstadt
09/04/06 - "Racism Is The Answer" by Scot Nery
04/21/07 - "Happy For Appetizers, Column #1:  Chick-Fil-A" by Mark Anundson
04/30/07 - "Why God Probably Looks Like Alicyn Sterling" by Ryan Williams
06/07/07 - "Happy For Appetizers, Column #2:  Super Value Meal" by Mark Anundson
06/11/07 - "Penis Surgery" by Scot Nery

Chad Riden: Mr. Riden's Rants

2001.01.13 - The trials and tribulations of the humor-impaired.
2001.01.24 - An unprofessionally editorialized news update.
2001.02.11 - Valentine's Day
2001.04.12 - Falling Off The Face Of The Earth
2001.06.22 - The Blackout Blues
2001.06.30 - Invasion of the Funkless Clone Women
2001.07.13 - The Starvation Diet
2001.09.12 - Attack On America
2001.09.22 - So... what's been going on in the news?
2001.10.03 - A Call For Genocide
2001.10.17 - Bad Late Show Impressions (Show #1693)
2001.10.18 - The Age Of Fear And Forwards
2001.11.14 - Thanks For Nothing
2001.11.26 - All Around The World For The Funny
2001.12.12 - Lame Late Show Impressions (Show #1723)
2001.12.21 - Consumas Greetings!
2001.12.28 - What's in? What's out?
2002.02.01 - Cameo Mentions and Life Long Missions
2002.03.08 - Thinking Outside The Box
2002.03.12 - Crazy Is As Crazy Does
2002.03.30 - Martyr Without A Cause
2002.04.13 - Imagine (No Stupid Bullshit)
2002.05.02 - So Long, Fucko, Part 2: Electric Boogaloo.
2002.05.28 - The Kids Hate Me
2002.06.21 - DaveCon 2002
2002.07.17 - Mud, Blood, and Dog Crap
2002.08.02 - The City That Never Lets Me Sleep
2002.08.14 - The Christian Cafe
2002.10.17 - Ring Of Fire
2002.11.07 - Baseball
2002.12.04 - All Roads Lead To Nashville
2003.01.18 - White, Fluffy Death
2003.03.13 - Save The Slant!
2003.06.12 - Oh, Baby!
2003.09.23 - Babycapades, Part 2
2005.05.20 - Parents Are Full Of Carp