Devoted followers of this column know that I usually rant and rave and bitch and moan, complaining about various evils in the world (Osama Bin Laden, Russell Crowe, Chad), then I end it with a silly tagline that even I don't like all that much.

Thankfully, I don't have any devoted followers, so this column will be like the rest of 'em.  Enjoy!

First, the usual site notes:  MangyDog is doing well . . . our Mangy Store is really picking up steam . . . the beer steins are a huge hit.  So, to all of you alcoholics out there, lemme just say thanks, and keep on buyin'!  Soon, we'll have some more video for you, and all kinds of other new, keen crap that will reward your indulgence.

Also, if you would like to be a humor columnist here at the Mange, send us your stuff . . . we'd be happy to look at it.  If you live in or Nashville, we'd love some help with filming our sketch comedy, so if you can contribute, drop us a line about that as well.  Now, onto some Random Droppings:

• Last Wednesday, I accidentally dropped a cinderblock on my head.  Let me tell ya something:  If you ever get the bright idea to drop a cinderblock on your head, or anybody else's head for that matter, keep in mind one thing:  IT HURTS.
• When did Jon Bon Jovi become the next Bruce Springsteen?  He's everywhere now, and he's treated like some Rock and Roll Hall of Fame-bound icon.  Look, I was there in the 80s . . . he SUCKED.  The really crappy thing is, he probably WILL go into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, which proves what I've said all along:  The Eighties were the hands-down lamest time in American History . . . at least until now.
• Most Overrated Human Being Alive?  I'll go with Ben Affleck. Or Oprah.
• What's the best way to brutally murder Osama Bin Laden without making him a martyr?  I mean, um . . . killing is wrong (now make a "jerking off" motion with your hand).
• I heard this last week while I was back home in East Tennessee:  "Sumbitch, Jimmy, you ain't supposed to wear white after September 1st!"  Since when did rednecks become so fashionable?  I didn't think they kept up with fashion trends.  "Goldurn, Billy Ray, that Christian Dior scarf yer wearin's nice as hell!"
• Open Mike at the Cantina now starts at 8:30 pm, starting next week.  For more info on Nashville comedy, go to www.nashvillestandup.com . . . and be sure to come on up or out or down or whatever on December 11th, where the great Tim Northern will be recording a show.  The man's a genius, you're gonna enjoy it.  Oh, and it's FREE, cheapass.
• Three months ago, I killed a man.
• Disregard that last thing.
• Chad's new column speaks the truth.  Read it and follow its teachings.
• And finally, if the Vols beat Florida this weekend, I will punch myself in the face in delirious celebration.  Or, at the very least, I'll drop another cinderblock on my head.

This is the MangyDog, over and out.